Insert joke about East vs West Coast rap here. And shit.
The past two weeks have seen a serious influx of visitors from back east. My parents were here for a week. A very dear friend was visiting with his girlfriend over the holidays and I got to hang out with him in my favorite local coffee shop.* And this week one of my oldest friends is here on a consulting gig and is staying with me over the weekend.
Maybe if this keeps up I won't have to go BACK THERE ever again...
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* How nice to be reminded that EVERYONE from my hometown ends their sentences in "and shit" and swears like a fucking sailor. Really. It was just like being home - without having to actually be home.
But if they all move out here and shit, then where the fuck will you be?
ReplyDeletePresumably you saw the news that Mens Fitness magazine rated Baltimore the #1 fittest fucking city and shit.
ReplyDeleteIf you find your language relapsing, Wikipedia has a fine selection of minced oaths with their origins (who knew where "gadzooks" came from?) Try coining your own, it could catch on and in ten years everyone wonders why they finish every faux-corn sentence in a shark, in shark.
Jiminy Cricket = Jesus Christ?? Cheese 'n' crackers got all muddy. I knew Disney was bad, but not that bad.
ReplyDeleteI might stick to "gorram." And some jonx. And shit.