A not-so-Friday-5 compilation.

Since I'm off until next Wednesday, I have a little time to catch up on things. Including This Book, which includes a checklist of things you're supposed to acknowledge having no intention of ever doing (to lessen the guilt when you don't ever do them). So I bring you the Top 5 Things I Will Never Do Before I Die:

1. Grow a tail
2. Become world chess champion
3. Understand Einstein
4. Learn the Periodic Table by heart
5. Eradicate hepititis C
   

Unrelated, but not really - Top 5 Things I NEED TO DO BEFORE I DIE - from the same list I had to choose from above:

1. Drink myself silly in New Zealand
2. Acquire a hard-ass nickname
3. Come out of a black hole alive
4. Jump bail
5. Start a revolution
   

And also unrelated - Top 5 Things I've Already Done That Are On This List:

1. Call my father 'pa'
2. Shovel manure
3. Give birth to a goatboy (just seeing if you are paying attention)
4. Blame God for everything
5. Smoke a Cuban cigar (hey - does that count as a felony??)
   

So what will YOU never do?