Goooooooooals.

OK, I'll be out of town for a bit so I hereby bring you the ceremonial summary of 4Q09 goals.

• three Fugitives & Refugees things/month... well, turns out that when you write a book that becomes famous, tourists overrun the weird stuff and the owners close up shop or deny the public access to their weird stuff. But Portland is weird with or without famous author assistance, which basically means that I saw a lot of weird stuff over the past three months but there wasn't a lot from the book involved. So... 3x3=9, right?

look at how PC our graffiti artists are! I mean, it really warms the heart!

there seems to be a trend of turning free newspaper
stands into bizarre, colorful works of art

this was the extent of the "dear will" letter

they let us eat here

I think this has to do with kidical mass
~ Critical Mass for kids

the kitschiest shop - well, the only kitschy shop -
in the Pearl... I have spent hours in this store

someone decided that Die Hard needed to become an art project
and actually rented space for this tribute to John McClane

erm... nothing at all weird about Captain Bogg and Salty!
best kiddie pirate band in the western hemisphere!

Santa Douche at Anticon

• run 13 miles by 12/31... well, turns out that when you get the flu the weekend before your grand finale, you don't run 13 miles by 12/31. But I got to 12, which means I can get to 13, which I will do as soon as the flu and sinus infection symptoms decide to make their merry way elsewhere and I can get back to training. New 1Q10 goal is "by 2/17" and if it doesn't happen by then, it ain't happening... and it's all good.
  
• figure out "the plan"... well, turns out when you reduce your schedule to 3 days a week you can get a lot more done. Why did no one mention this before? I have everything from actual plans to thoughtful ideas to vague notions, all of which will culminate into a really great 3.5 months overseas. And I have a lot of shit to do by 2/17. New 1Q10 goal is "by 2/17... get all this shit done."
  

Next up, the year we don't know how to refer to ("oh-ten?" "ten?" "one-zero?"). Also known as, the most amazing year I have yet to witness. No goals till June at the earliest! I'm off to do some L-I-V-I-N.

Happy new year!

A look inside my flu-recovering multi-everything-ing brain.

Must look up storage... Cool, hockey is on!... I want pizza... Really need to figure out how to get from Buenos Aires to Quito... Wow, Red Wings haven't scored... $800 for a flight - are you kidding me?!?!... Hmm, $1 for the first month and a discount on 3 months or more? Sold... Oh, that looks like a good pizza dough recipe... Best season to visit = Jan-May, man how could I NOT go to the Galapagos?... Dammit, forgot to return those library books I never read... "Hi, other travel clinic, can you send my itemized list from February so that I can submit a claim? Ktxsbai!"... Ooooh jump drive chock full o'music from Mark - must download and absorb immediately! Well, download now, absorb soon... Wow, still no score, really?... {Sidestep to write thank you's for Christmas presents.}... Maybe Antarctica travel lady can help with flights to Quito... Still don't know Spanish, hope that surfing/Spanish immersion program is all it's cracked up to be... Caps v Flyers on 1/17 - I am SO there... I can fit all this crap into a 10'x10' box, right?... You're the RED WINGS, just score already! Jeez... Hmm, where the hell is my passport?... Add to "to do ASAP in 2010" list - pay taxes, cancel cable, send intent to vacate letter to landlord... Overtime, wow... Next apartment will be on floor 2 or higher, have decent heat and full bath... COLUMBUS WINS IN OT!... When did Ohio get a hockey team?

The end.

Early Wednesday three.

I'm a mile away from 4Q goal #2 as of this evening, so I thought I would take this opportunity to explain why I brought this upon myself again this year. Last year it seemed like a good idea until Her Majesty got sick, and the country and candidates leading up to the election got all hateful, and I realized that I would never like my job at the time (which is my job still, but which is soon to be not my job anymore). I got to 8 miles and pretty much threw in the towel.

This year I gave it another try because I'm in a much better state of mind. And I think it might actually work, because:

• I haven't done much long-distance hiking since August, so I should probably make sure my legs and knees can handle lots of strain since I'm not sure where or for how long I will be walking as of March 14.
  
• I'm back in "jeez my clothes are huge I really need to gain some weight" mode (for reasons unbeknown to me but for which I've confirmed there is no medical rationale), and keeping up the running for a bit longer will ensure that when I gain 15 pounds on the 3-week cruise, my slightly-larger-than-needed travel clothes will fit perfectly rather than hanging off me like they do now.
• Spaghetti, sushi, peanut butter and bagels. And? As if that weren't enough, OMG there is nothing better than finishing 12 miles at 9:30pm and replenishing your sodium levels with a TJ's cornmeal crust Greek pizza at 11:22pm, totally guilt-free. I mean, really. NOTHING.
  

Heading south for the winter.

Last weekend I headed out to see what Klamath Falls, Crater Lake and some other nearby old towns were all about. Turns out, not much.

Crater Lake is pretty, for sure:


And they have a nice gift shop, and they keep the road plowed to the rim in the winter, and the post office at the visitor center closes at 2pm. That's about all I can say about Crater Lake. Other than, I hear it's lovely in the summer.

Earlier that weekend I headed a bit farther south on my way to Lava Beds National Monument and ran across this sign:

... and I got a little nostalgic. I then bought a couple of postcards and got charged sales tax, and the nostalgia went away. (I suppose if I'd pumped my own gas I could've brought it back?)

I did have a lot of fun in the caves though. There are about two dozen that they just let you wander through with a flashlight. The other caves I've visited (Sacramento, South Dakota, Colorado) required guided tours, but for this one I showed up, alone, around noon, and asked the gal at the front desk what she recommended, and she sent me off with two flashlights ("just in case") and a map with some stuff circled. Because it's winter there, the park was empty... and as a result the whole experience was pretty amazing.

Most of the caves are upright-walkable. Some you have to crouch in places, and a few require crawling. I didn't do the crawling ones out of respect for my knees (and my closet claustrophobia), but I definitely got deep underground in a few.

(Golden Dome)

In one of the earlier caves I was about 200 feet in, and I turned off the flashlight and stood in the dark listening to the silence. The wind was loud and gusting outside, and as a result the temperature was close to 25 degrees and close enough to freezing to my non-acclimated body. Inside the cave it was a balmy 55, slightly humid and... absolutely silent.

It was amazing.

And then I was reminded of recent mountain lion attacks in the area and I freaked out a little. "Surely they wouldn't just let people wander around solo if mountain lions were in the area. Surely. Right? I mean, this is a national effing monument after all, they can't afford bad publicity." And all was right again.

And then 25 years of pop culture kicked in. I saw a flash of the Indiana Jones scene where the water comes gushing through the tunnel, and I freaked out a little more and turned the flashlight back on. And then I saw flashes from The Lost Boys and I jerked the flashlight up to make sure no vamps or bats were lounging over my head. And then I remembered the cave scenes from The Goonies, which I'd watched on fuzzy cable the night before at the cheap motel, which is soooo not a scary movie but some of those scenes!... And then another two dozen scenes from Buffy ran through my head, and then...

And then I laughed at myself, appreciated the adrenaline rush, and moved on to the next cave. And? That night on fuzzy cable? The Lost Boys! I have seen it half a million times and could recite the lines in my sleep, but there was something serendipitous about the timing which resulted in my eyes being glued to the set the whole time despite having the next day to plan and Christmas cards to glue and emails to write. (Thank you, Joel Schumacher and the Coreys. Sparkling vamps my ass.)

These weekend trips have been experiments. I'm testing my tolerance after this recent revelation... So Eastern Oregon I planned pretty well. Southern Oregon, I knew where I was staying (and generally speaking, what was in the area), and I took some guide books, and that was the extent of the plan. Crater Lake was planned. The Lava Bed caves were not, I ran across them in the book the night before and they ended up being my favorite part of the trip.

The whole reason for the Southern Oregon adventure had to do with something I read in a guide book about 500 bald eagles nesting there in the winter. I'm not a big bird fan... Well, I'm a Big Bird fan but I'm generally not into birds. The bird refuges just across the border in CA did not excite me but they did interest me and I approached them as an opportunity to relax and to test my camera's sports/action mode. I ended up marveling at dozens of species of those amazing creatures - watching raptors float mid-air on their way to doing nothing, being guided through the auto tour by the same gorgeoous golden eagle, reminding myself to just sit back and observe and not worry about the perfect picture. That day I encountered three of the nine bald eagles recently seen in the area. Two are here:

Grungy and scrappy and scavengery and therefore worthy of being our nation's emblem? Sure. Creepily watching me as I ate my sandwich while taking tons of photos of them? Definitely.

So overall, I think the plan is working well. In a few weeks I'm heading down the 101 to Coastal Oregon. Other than having a few places of interest I'd like to check out, I'm going to wing it. And it's going to be amazing. This is the start of a whole new perspective, and I'm loving every minute of it. (I know, I know - I don't know who she is or what she did with Jen(n) - but I'm also not complaining...)

Friday five.

It's that time, well it was that time yesterday, so today's Friday five is about things I am particularly thankful for right now:

• my family, whose health has had many ups and downs over the years but who have been holding steady at "relatively healthy" lately
  
• my car, which doesn't complain too much about going 1000 miles in 4 days twice in a month when it's usual average is 10 miles/week
  
• my knees, which allowed me to run 9 miles Wednesday night also without much complaint (4 to go!)
• my town, which has been very good to me over the last year and a half
• my friends, who are mostly older and always wiser, who put up with me, make me laugh out loud (a lot), and challenge me to be a better person inside and out

And here's the cheese... it's not even good stinky runny cheese, it's the kind that's shaped into a ball and rolled in almonds that's on sale around the holidays, but it kind of spoke to me last weekend:


Like the spirit of Christmas, keep yesterday with you all through the year. Gratitude is a very powerful (and empowering) thing. Happy holidays!

My very own IMMD.

I've been following this site pretty religiously lately, as a way to find humor in life's little whatevers and whathaveyous. Most of them induce a smile or an "awwww!" and make me want to ignore reality in favor of those brief seconds where it all makes sense.

Today I had the opportunity to play the Buffy video game. I should note that I haven't played a video game (other than Super Mario Brothers for about 5 minutes recently and Zaxxon using my keyboard's arrow keys several years ago) in approximately 20 years, and I'd certainly never played with such a complicated controller. Once I got the hang of it, though, it was a lot of fun. The cast commentary was about half-authentic and certainly less than stellar (Willow is not dumb goddammit! and where the hell is Giles?) but after a while I was staking vamps like nobody's business.

And then my friend and I checked out the multi-player options, and there was one where we eventually realized we could just beat the crap out of each other (as Spike vs Buffy)... and while I abhor violence on general principal and would never wish physical harm on this person... it totally MMD.

"So look, I don't hate children. I don't know how that rumor started."

I stole that from a David Cross bit, where he goes on to describe his friends who've had children and how their most interesting stories revolve around their children staring at grapes.

I actually love the offspring of my friends. They are adorable and charming, and they do far more interesting things than stare at grapes. Like make pirate faces on command, or sit contently in my arms for many minutes at a time, or finally giggle at me after many encounters of shyness over almost two years.

The children I do not enjoy are the ones who throw temper tantrums at airports.

Grocery stores and toy stores I totally get and support, at least to some degree. But airports? Really? I get airplanes - the ear pressure and turbulence and bumpy landings and scary mean flight attendants and no food and all - and I have no beefs whatsoever about kids screaming their lungs out on airplanes - but airports?

I had one of those last night out of Oakland. Someone's 3(ish)-year-old ran around the terminal for 20 minutes pre-boarding screaming "BUT I DON'T WANT TO GET ON THE AIRPLANE!!!!!!!!!!" at the top of her lungs. Yeah, we don't want you to either, kid, I kept thinking. The older gentleman in line next to me saw my scrunched up face and said, "oh, but they're not always like that," to which I instinctively replied, "maybe so, but I still don't want any," to which he replied, "oh, but it's so rewarding, I have 4 grandchildren, wouldn't trade them for the world, [blah blah blah]," at which point I felt bad for being a grouch...

And then 30 seconds later I heard a couple my age a few feet ahead of me (who could not have possibly heard my conversation with Grandpa over the 3-yr-old tantrum) say "wow I am so glad we agreed not to have kids." And then I didn't feel so bad.

However! A brand-new online community that I am happy to promote has made me see the light. Temper tantrum advice here. Some of this is funny, some is sarcastic, some is spot on. And there is much more life enriching advice throughout the site. Including consumer electric advice! Now how much would you pay?

I've been a Dooce fan ever since I learned you could get fired from writing about your job on the Internet (she did - I aspire not to, though I'm sure I'm capable of doing so if my intentions were good). Her daily creativity, whether it be humor or photography or design or people-interactions, inspires me. She and her husband approach parenthood, and life, and married life with the same gusto-coupled-with-world-weariness that I expect I would in that situation. (And she mocks Mormonism. I mean, come on. You've gotta love her just for that.)

So, please click away and enjoy, and rack up the ads for her... Because I haven't bought any of her books yet and I feel a little guilty about that. Dooce and I thank you in advance.

Progress.

I had a long talk with someone today about these quarterly goals and whether they are helpful or harmful. In the end I decided they were helpful, except for last year around this time when I had the exact same running goal and ended up not meeting it due to a dying cat and hating work and general world-weariness that did not put me in a good space to be running 13 miles, yet I got as far as 8 at one time, yet I beat myself up about not making that goal. This year, though? ALL OVER IT. Six miles down as of Monday, seven additional to go. In eight weeks. Eh, whatever, it's been done... and if it's not done again, this year I'm simply not going to care. (But it will be done. Mark my words.)

In other goal-related news... October's Fugitives & Refugees attempt was a bit of a bust. The Wilhelm's Portland Memorial, which would've been a great Octoberish activity, is now closed to the public except during specific, sporadic tour hours. (This is most likely due to the book. Thank you, Chuck.) Mount Gleall Castle, Portland's equivalent of the Winchester Mystery House and also good around Halloween time, isn't accessible to the public, it turns out. And I'd really intended to go to Powell's rare book room, where the ghost of the founder allegedly hangs out on Tuesday evenings, but there was yoga to be done. Much more important for my psyche this quarter.

But! The Sauvie Island corn maize was taken a step further - I went to the haunted version and it was ridiculously awesome. (Next year I am working there. How fun would it be to walk 4" behind people dressed as a zombie? Hell, I'd volunteer my time for that.) And I went to the Roloff farm, not featured in Chuck's book for many reasons, the main one being that it wasn't around when he wrote it. But this?

Spooooooky!

Besides. Not that I'm competitive or hold myself to stupidly high standards or anything (ahem) but I've done plenty in the book already. Wild Abandon, Fuller's? Check. (Yum and meh, respectively.) Hippo Hardware? I love their hippos. The underground tour? Yup. The "getting off" chapter? Ummmmmm... no thank you. When the vegan strip club closed before I even moved here, the sordid life left nothing of interest to me.

Anyway, never fear. October may have been only moderately successful, but there is plenty of F&R in store for November and December. I may not even have to plan November's, if all goes well. Have I mentioned lately that I love this town?

And as far as The Plan, well, it's coming along. More to figure out this weekend, and more conversational Spanish to learn. Stay tuned.

Thought o' the day.

There are worse things than bonding with your older male boss over the virtues of the Twilight series.

 

(There, are... right?)

Get over it.

If I can't tolerate maintenance guys outside my window every morning disrupting my morning routine for the third week straight with at least two more weeks to go (no, property management people, I am not a day sleeper no I am not home all day LOOK YOU ARE MISSING THE POINT they cause me to shut my windows and they make a lot of noise during my dark, quiet time and I don't like that!), how the heck am I going to tolerate not knowing where I'll be tomorrow or the next day or the next week? 

 

Time to stop whining, accept a little mold-breaking and spontaneously deal with the situation at hand. 

 

Any thoughts on how to make that easier?  This creature of habit is a little concerned.

A haiku for my new toy.

no spots when I zoom

vibrant hues, options a'plenty

{hearting} this camera

Eco-lazy.

It's become a personal challenge at this point. How high can I pile it before I need to take the 20 foot walk to the recycling bin outside?

Ahhhh, single living.

I am sure living in SPAIN had nothing to do with it...

... but still, a good reason to whip up some hummous or splurge on that feta cheese for the salad, especially as winter and the darkness starts to set in.

Rockumentaries.

First was The Devil and Daniel Johnston. This was recommended to me, though I can't remember by whom, and going into it I had no idea who he was. It was ironing day so it didn't really matter. Anyway, early on they identified Johnston as the guy who made the "Hi How Are You" tape, which was made into a t-shirt, which Kurt Cobain wore every waking second after that, apparently.

Johnston follows the path of Brian Wilson, writing a lot of really good music and making great art before declining into mental illness. Along the way he also finds religion and preaches to audiences about the devil in between songs about desire. Ironic or poetic, I'm not really sure. The people around him watch his decline and finally get him somewhat back on track, and that's good, because he really is talented. It seems that I just missed his Portland show in September but I'll keep an eye out for him in the future. You should too.

And in keeping with the religious, musical and "Daniel" themes I watched Danielson: A Family Movie. It was interesting, but there were only two things that stuck with me. One, their music was like no other "Christian rock" I've heard. Considering that along with their general attitudes and respect for each other and actually seeming to lead a "Christian" life, I ended up unexpectedly liking it, and them, a lot. Two, at the time of the documentary Daniel Smith was mentoring a then-unknown Sufjan Stevens. The mentee has surpassed the mentor in this case, but the mentor shows no resentment. Refreshing.

There, I just saved you three hours. Next time you can do my ironing, mmmmkay?

I must know.

Never mind that other question I want to ask Colin Meloy the next time he signs my poster. Now I just want to know if "that wretched girl Dawn" is an homage to Joss, in some way.

Inspired.

I watched Autism: the Musical last night. A big part of it was about the kids, and their stories, and their day-to-day life and interactions with each other in rehearsals for the musical. They each had different severities of the disease, and struggled with different things every day, but they all had ways of communicating their needs and fears and hopes. But the other side of the story was about the parents and how they coped with having children who weren't treated as equals to "normal" children (their air quotes, not mine).

It was heartbreaking and heartening all at the same time, and I laughed and cried (sometimes both at once) through the whole almost-two hours. Highly recommended.

October is here already? I suspect a conspiracy.

OK, so a wrap-up on last quarter's goals:

• At least 2 road trips - check, check.
  
• New restaurant every week - I'm pretty sure I was successful in this endeavor. My favorite new find is Sweet Basil, just a few blocks from my apartment, where they serve the best crab ranggoon appetizer and the vegetarian pad thai is so earthy and hearty. And? Happy hour drinks all day Sunday, how can you beat that?
  
• 5 new Portland bands - check, check, check, check, check. Favorite new PDX finds: Blind Pilot and Morning Teleportation. Lots of great stuff out of the overall PNW at the music fest though.
  
• Anything on The List - #10, check. (I knew it was on the list somewhere.)

And so, the goals for the next few months:

• Three things/month from Fugitives and Refugees.
• Run 13 miles by December 31. Yesterday I ran for the first time in months and it felt great (although it was a bit painful). If I increase a mile a week, 13 miles in as many weeks will be gravy.
• Figure out "the plan." Um, yeah. More to come on that.
• Anything on The List... although I'm two years ahead already, soon to be three. Perhaps I should enjoy the moment and slow down?
  

Will probably need more than nature to get over this one.

I did something really stupid recently, so to temporarily take my mind off that move I decided to seek solace in nature. (But just some quick solace - I had other shit to do today.)

I ran across some information about Carver Park. Close by, and where some of Twilight was filmed. The movie was wretched but the scenery did exemplify Oregon, so I decided to check it out.

Not much to it. Also, empty. I sat by this stream for about an hour and didn't see a soul:

Walking out I was still kicking myself, but despite that I was able to appreciate the beauty of lush, green Oregon.

I could live there. Right there. It's hard to do stupid things to trees.

HA-ha!

(Was that mean?)

Friday five.

Five things I am excited about as a result of recent events, in no particular order:

• Watching east coast hockey face-offs at 4:30pm.
• A temporary halt in screenplay idea additions, but actually having time and energy to work on the damned screenplay. (And/or novel. Whatever.)
• Fall in the PNW.
• Testing the limits of my frugality.
• Getting my priorities straight, my shit together and my act figured out. (And/or having lots of fun. Whatever.)

It's gonna be the BEST. FALL. EVER.