Definitely in my top ten right now.

Say it with me... This is my dance space. This is your dance space. I don't go into yours, you don't go into mine.

I reaaaaaaaaaaaally need to stop calling it "mandatory fun."

I do. But look, it's not just me:

We're going to have fun, dammit, even if it makes you mad!

Office Mandatory Fun - Its should be fun naturally.

Social Obligations in Law Offices: All Frosting, No Cake.

And the one to rule them all.

Happy apple-bobbing, pumpkin carving and costume contesting at the office tomorrow!

It's definitely not a tumor.

But it's quite probably an ulcer. Yay!

This means that for at least a week I get...

• no full-fat anything
• no raw vegetables
• no spicy food
  
• no caffeine
• no alcohol

Since I'm pretty sure it's self-induced*, I'm okay with all of this except the last one. No alcohol? On November 4? Come ON! How the hell do I make it through that without a bottle of whiskey?

I'm also going to Oakland for 4 minutes next Thursday-Sunday and most of those 4 minutes involve alcohol and/or coffee and/or good food so that's unfortunate. But if I am careful (and don't down a bottle of something other than Tums on Tuesday night) I should be okay for moderation next weekend. Fingers crossed.

In the meantime, hooray for bland food! ... Meh.

________________
* I was trying on winter clothes a few weeks ago and realized that because I had lost about 10 pounds since May, nothing fit. So this winter I could either a) wear huge clothes and look like a bag lady, b) buy new clothes that actually fit, or c) gain 10 pounds fast to make the winter clothes sort of fit through the winter.

I figured a) would just depress me and c) is more cost effective than b) especially since I've already spent money on new summer clothes to accommodate the loss... Plus, c) would be more fun! Wine and cheese and pizza and ice cream and no gym and couch and TV for a few weeks! So that's what I went with.

Mission accomplished. The temporary depression from the past few weeks was an added bonus as it enabled me to eat more (and more crap) than usual... On the down side, one should probably not gain so much weight in a short period of time as it stresses out your GI system, and the depression probably contributed to stress which is not a cause of ulcers but it is a contributing factor.

Yeah, I did a lot of ulcer research between crappy daytime TV shows today.

So I'm not sure the cost of what this did to my tummy was worth the money I saved, all said and done. Let this be a lesson to you: buy timeless fashion and keep all your various sizes of clothes forever. And ever and ever amen.

Wednesday three.

________________
Laurelhurst Park, 10/26/08

"How's that working out for you?"

"What?"

"Being clever."

"... Great."

"Keep it up then."

(Please keep it up! I need more.)

There is fall outside my apartment.

I know it’s hard to conceive.

But there’s fall outside my apartment.

And I'm only gonna see it if I leave.

Get it? Leave? Leaf? Get it?

Never mind.

Week 1.

These are from an actual nursery, rather than a drugstore or Home Depot. So far, so good. Look how green! I'll keep you posted.

And here I thought BNL stood for Barenaked Ladies.

Wall-E: I loved the bit with the spork. I loved the bit with the laser pointer (aha, so it's not just my cat that goes for that trick!). Of course I loved the environmental spin. And I know it's irrational to love a cartoon robot, but I fell in love with Wall-E. (Sorry, R2D2.) OK... I loved all the details in this flick, which just means that Pixar keeps raising the bar, movie after movie, which is a great thing for us but probably not really for their already hard-working employees. Be warned, it has a happy ending. I guess you would expect nothing less of a Pixar film though.

In other movie news...

Across the Universe: Hair will always be my favorite anti-war movie/musical, but other than the (again!) happy ending, I thought this was an interesting take on the '60s by way of Beatles songs... and the actors did a really good job. Fans of the Cirque Beatles show might appreciate this one.

Death at a Funeral: An amusing 90 minutes of familial mayhem at a funeral featuring Wash from Firefly (fully disrobed for most of his scenes, no less) and Finbar from the Station Agent (fully clothed throughout the movie). Good times, if you like those guys and have 90 minutes to spare. Otherwise, skip it.

Beowulf: yeah... not sure how this got into my queue, but I'm pretty sure I read this book in high school, and I ate at the Bay Wolf in Oakland a few times, so I think I'm okay with sending it back unwatched.

Name that bridge.

This evening walking home, I realized that I need to quit my job to make up for all the lost black&white photo ops I have missed since owning this camera. (Or, go back three years in time. But quitting my job sounds like more fun right now.)

It has black&white VIDEO too... There goes the weekend.

Nostalgia.

I randomly tuned in to stream KFOG this morning. After hearing a strange comment by one of the DJs, I poked around the site and discovered that Dave Morey is leaving the station. (Of-his-own-accord-to-live-in-a-house-on-a-lake-in-the-midwest, they were quick to clarify in the audio and him in his own blog. Like anyone would ever fire him.)

I briefly wrote about my introduction to Morey a few years ago. He's pretty much a Bay Area staple. Fog, the Castro, year-round farmers markets, the Fillmore, City Lights Bookstore, the Parkway, weekends on Telegraph Avenue in Berzerkeley, Dave Morey. Those are the things I think of when I get nostalgic for my old town.

OK, Bay Area folks. What says "Bay Area" to you?

Serendipity.

Yesterday I learned that one of the guys I respect the most at work is from my exact same hometown. I knew he was from my home state, but he spent most of his time in another city and he hadn't mentioned our hometown before.

It was pretty interesting that it would be that guy compared to anyone else.

That's all.

Wednesday three.

Three things I covet today, in no particular order:

• Skull & Crossbones Tap and Faucet
• The Wire: The Complete Series
• Crazy Robots tote bag
  

OK, the last one I can certainly afford and implement into my daily life. The other two, not so much. Unless I buy a house or quit my job.

On the other end of the spectrum, two things I no longer covet...

One is a solar-powered iPod charger. I inquired around quite a bit, and ended up going with ThinkGeek's product since they have never steered me wrong before. It's supposed to arrive next Tuesday, right around the time the sun is scheduled to go away for nine months... Excellent! My 19 year old iPod doesn't last more than an hour when charged overnight with real kW, so I'm curious to see if this thing will give me a song or two with its charging power. Look for experimental results in the near future.

And... may I have a drumroll please. For the last three years I could not believe that my fancy digital camera did not have black&white ability. It was my only regret about purchasing this camera - I've been utterly thrilled with it otherwise. Just now, I was searching for an example of a digital camera with black&white ability that I could covet... And ran across instructions on how to access my own camera's black&white ability, which is SOOOOOOOOO not in the manual - anywhere, believe me I have looked - and lo and behold, it works:


This officially takes fall photography to a hnl... (And makes me happier than you can possibly imagine.)

On misunderestimation.

I saw W. today.

I wasn't going to see this, ever. Because I haven't appreciated an Oliver Stone movie since JFK, because I especially didn't want to see a movie about W. no matter how good all the impersonations allegedly were, because Burn After Reading sounded more interesting... the "because"s go on and on.

But my in-town-friends left a little earlier than expected, and a matinee sounded nice but the timing of Burn After Reading would not have allowed a much needed after-in-town-friend's-visit gym session, and it turns out someone I went to high school with was in the movie.

So I saw W. today.

At some point during the movie, I actually felt bad for the man I have actively hated for the past eight years. And that made me mad, which was good gym fodder.

Everything else* aside, I'm pretty sure the paragraph above means that the combination of Stone and Brolin was pure genius.

_______________
*Stellar performances by everyone. And I mean everyone, like I couldn't figure out who Cheney was for an embarrassing number of minutes. And there were eventual pointed Stone-like critiques at Bush's administration and gritty war Stone-like truthiness that left quite a few of us in the theater teary (if post-scene sniffles count as evidence).

But, man. I closed my eyes during one of the speeches and I would not have known that was Josh Brolin.

Fall progress, act I.

I'm trying to remember to take my camera with me every day so that I can photojournal the fall season. It's not quite here - but it's teetering on the edge. I have a suspicion that one day soon I will wake up and the leaves will be brilliant shades of crayola (act II)... and the next day I will wake up and they will be littered all over the streets and the rain will start (act III).

But first a little context. I work near the South Park Blocks where they hold the farmer's market spring-fall. There are benches and statues and maybe even a fountain somewhere. Anyway, it's been a stunning strip of green for the past five months:


And the leaves are just starting to turn:


I'm excited to see how the strip changes colors over the next few weeks.

I noticed more significant signs of fall in the Whole Foods parking lot in the NE last night (which I was excited to discover, since it's more convenient than the one closer to my apartment):

But I'm most excited to take a sick day for Act II, head up to Hood River and wear my camera out... My, um, "scratchy throat" is poised and ready.

"Get higher baby and don't ever come down..."

I was walking around at lunch yesterday and noticed a large white V in the sky. Seemed a little odd that planes would make such a thing - possible, but a little odd. Then I realized that there were about six white lines originating from the same general location.

I could only get four of them in the shot because of the trees, but this was now officially odd to me. Walking back to the office I saw something similar in the other direction of the sky:


And for the rest of the day I sang this song.

Portland skies are amazing. Always. I prefer the sky with puffy white or gray clouds, which I suspect I will see a lot more of in the coming months, but the steady piercing blue, and the blue with kindergarten art I saw yesterday, also never fail to stop me in my tracks.

Maybe just in henna?

I've been contemplating a new tat and this is a pretty awesome idea... One that would be awesome for about five minutes, but still, awesome.

Public service announcement.

Attention music lovers... Ben Folds is putting tracks from his recent live shows on iTunes. You can download "Sound of Last Night...This Morning" recorded at Detroit's Fillmore (why is there such a thing in Detroit of all places? SF, Denver, sure - but Detroit?!) starting today.

Don't know Ben Folds? OMG what is WRONG with you already? Sheesh.

"You scored 5 out of a possible 12..."

"Rather ignorant, I’m afraid. You’re clearly reading in slavish obedience to the censors. Are you going to be voting for Sarah Palin?"

GADS!! No, and I'm not moving to Alaska either. I'm just slightly optimistic about worldly views. (How is Call of the Wild "too radical," Yugoslavia? Too cold, maybe. Too cruel, definitely. But too radical? Really?)

Oh, and also, I haven't read half those books. Now adding them to my list so that one day I can wear this with pride.

[Digression... Was Lord of the Flies ever on a banned list? That was a truly great book that I should re-read someday soon. What about Catch-22? End of digression.]

Anywho, what's your score? I already gave you one answer!

Testing another theory...

And now, Connie will give me one million dollars.

;)

That information really would've been more useful to me yesterday.

"And right now, it's certainly helpful, if not mandatory, to be just a little optimistic about it."

Sir, yes, sir!

In other news... Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew.

"They've put a net there to catch their fall like it'll stop anyone at all..."

I posted a negative review of this movie a while ago, and I still feel the same way. Today's vote just makes me sad.

I am growing increasingly tired of the various levels of government setting the "reactive" example rather than proactively deciding that, hmm maybe we should figure out why so many people in our country are prescribed anti-depressants, or, gee why the polar ice caps seem to be melting a bit more than usual, or, wow look at all those people injecting themselves with one of the most poisonous naturally occurring substances - golly, maybe we should take a step back and figure out why this is happening. And actually address it.

You know why? Because it trickles down. It sets the tone. Rather, it sets the expectation. I think I have had one experience in corporate life where the root cause was actually examined, thoroughly, and proper actions were taken to ensure the incident would not occur again in the future. The other 90 million incidents have gone unchecked and instead of thoughtfully prepping for positivity, there has been scrambling to deal with negativity.

And that's how this presidential campaign has gone down.

And that's how this recent collapse of the American economy has gone down.

And that's how my job has recently gone down.

And that's why I have spent the past 10 days incredibly, unbelievably depressed about the current state of our country (and the future of our country and my current employment sitch) and lacking any hope that any of it is going to change. Lacking any hope in change we need or change we can believe in. Lacking any interest in watching anything other than 24/7 news, much like the 9/11 days.

Depressed in the truest sense of the word - avoiding people in general and all social situations specifically, distracted at work, sleeping too much... (And likely gaining 10 pounds because of all the alcohol and lack-of-gym and excessive-sleeping that all of this has inflicted upon my mentality. At least I can afford to gain 10 pounds. So I've got that going for me.)

I know I am not alone.

Sometimes it just feels that way.

Thank goodness for Facebook! I posted a truncated status tonight and I've already received a "rationale" status comment and a "CALL ME IMMEDIATELY" message from people I went to high school with. Maybe they have the answers.

I should at least let the "CALL ME IMMEDIATELY" guy know I'm not actually on the bridge and have no plans to be on any bridge in the next three days. It was sweet - albeit a bit confused - of him to message me though.

Who are we kidding... I am really just bitter that my landlord has turned on the uncontrollable-by-individual-renters heat and now I am stuck with less square apartment footage due to the amount of space I need to clear around the heaters, and way too much heat for my already also(note the excellent misuse of "also" which I plan to make a running gag until she is out of the picture)-running-hot self.

________________
But how about that Connecticut Supreme Court also?! Huh?? Huh!! And perhaps the end is near for the woman who can't use the word "also" properly? Also!

Thank God it's not just me.

Of late, and more often than not, mine would be the Buffy menu. But I had the Arrested Development menu memorized at one point for this very reason.

(Well, minus the bowl. Because that just leads straight to a heroin IV and next thing you know, you're pawning your mom's wedding ring for crack. So says every bad sitcom ever to exist, so it must be true.)

Public service announcement.

If I say hello to you, it does not mean I am interested in you.

That is all.

Everybody else is doing it...

6:01 - Tom makes a funny!

6:04 - no, that guy asking the first question is not related to me.

6:06 - PLEASE RAISE MY TAXES. PLEASE. I can afford it.

6:08 - "not you, Tom" in response to who should be the next Secretary of the Treasury?? oh dear God.

6:10 - "fundamental differences" - drink!

6:12 - "I suspended my campaign" is the new "9-11."

6:13- bored now.

6:14 - oh no he didn't.

...

6:45 - appalled now. They're ALL making funnies! I do not want a funny President! I do not want a President I would invite to a barbecue! I do not want a President I would eat cheese with! (But I am excited about seeing that movie. And now I want some cheese.)

6:48 - OH MA... Fuck it. Just read this...

Wait.

7:32 - "fundamental differences" - drink!

OK, now go to the yeti.

"And we'll accept the things we cannot avoid, for now..."

I'm updating my resume... because... you know, you just never know. And because yesterday Kate Monster told me to go after the things I want while I'm still in my prime. And because I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it.

And I'm realizing that I have no idea what I do.

Sigh.

I {heart} Sarah Silverman.

And Leo, and Toby, and Ellen, and Halle, and Dustin, and Forrest, and Benecio, and Ashton, and Laura, and Giovanni, and that stoner kid from all the Seth Rogen/Judd Apatow movies, and ...

Add a comment. PLEASE.

I really need to stop drunk Netflixing.

I can only imagine that is the reason for my random mailbox entries...

Gone Baby Gone: I was actually looking forward to this - it got a good review from a friend whose movie reviews I trust, and never mind the Ben connection - Amy Ryan can do no wrong in my book. But I spent half the movie trying to figure out what the hell everyone was saying and the other half trying to figure out why everything I watch these days is about police corruption. However... as with Mystic River and American Beauty - both of which I hated immediately after seeing - I haven't been able to stop thinking about this movie, and I think that means it's actually quite brilliant. Let me know your thoughts.

The Brave One: If I could say something to Clint Eastwood it would be that he needs to DIRECT, not act. I would say the same to Jodie Foster. At least I got to see her kiss Naveen Andrews. Mmmmm... Naveen Andrews. And interact with Terrence Howard. Mmmmm... Terrence Howard.

Dreamgirls: Oh dear god. I am totally sure this was a lovely movie but it sat on my TV for weeks - WEEKS - before I even contemplated watching it, and today's rainy-day-catch-up-on-Netflix-sitting-on-my-TV-for-weeks endeavor did not result in me watching this movie. It is sealed and ready to go back to the warehouse.

Next up, and you better not let me down:

• Across the Universe, which was recommended by a few folks - including my own folks.
• The Darjeeling Limited, which just seems kooky.
• I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With, which I just do.
  

And while we're at it, I really need to stop drunk iTunesing. Seriously!! Who put Fall Out Boy on my iPod? I know *I* put the Kelly Clarkson and Timberlake and Bee Gees and Elton on there. But Fall Out Boy??

At last, validation for my addiction.

It's funny because it's true...

(I mean, seriously?? An hour straight around 1pm today? For no reason?)

Public service announcement.

Best Freddy Rodríguez role ever? El Wray in Planet Terror. Second best Freddy Rodríguez role ever? Federico Diaz in Six Feet Under.

But third best Freddy Rodríguez ever? Guest starring as Carla's brother on Scrubs. Almost as good as Heather Graham's pseudo-guest role. But not quite. And way better than Tara Reid's pseudo-guest role.

Sidenote PSA: I think I've seen just about every episode, some more than once, and Scrubs is one of the best shows of my generation. After Buffy. And House. And Firefly. And Seinfeld. And Curb Your Enthusiasm. And the Wire. And possibly Angel after Spike joined the cast.

There, I said it.

Um... Saturday... four? six?? I have no idea...

... but it's all about me so that's all that really matters:

> A) Four places that I go to over and over:
Trader Joe's, the gym, the park with the waterfall near my office, Hawthorne Street

> B) Four people who e-mail me (regularly):
Barack Obama, David Plouffe, Joe Biden, Michelle Obama (seriously... it's bordering on spam)

> C) Four of my favorite places to eat :
Spettro (always! I hope I don't ruin it with hype), the taco cart near PSU (mmm, $1.50 fish tacos), the Indian cart near 9th and Alder (mmm, palaak paneer with the best cheese EVER), sitting on my couch (mmm, couch)

> D) Four places I would rather be right now
snorkeling in Queensland, exploring Antarctica, sitting on the beach in Santorini, kayaking in Alaska

> E) Four people I think will respond (/comment):
maybe Connie? on a particularly bored night, Melinda? I can't think of anyone else.

> F) Four TV shows I watch over and over:
Buffy, Scrubs, Daily Show, Animal Cops

And you?

Not really Wednesday three.

I completed almost all of my 3Q08 goals. The only incomplete goal is to get to the Bagdad Theatre. It's not my fault that they've shown crap for three months! But now? Wall-E and Sarah Vowell (please don't be sold out please don't be sold out please don't be sold out) in the same month? I am so there. (Madeleine Albright is also making an appearance this month, but that sounds way too serious and potentially gloomy.)

Anyway, my 4Q08 goals, in addition to getting to the Bagdad:

• Run 10 miles. All at once, and in less than 2 hours. Hey, I did 8.5mi during the span of the first presidential debate, what's another 1.5?
  
• Do something on my "things to do before I retire" list. I have until January 21 to complete something. Anything. The possibilities are endless, but realistically it's probably going to be #22 or #30, or reading one of those books (or swapping them out for another monumental book that is more appealing).
  
• Go to the Crystal Springs Rhododendron Garden. It's supposedly best in late spring so I guess I'll be going back again next year, but I'm hard pressed to find a season when a nice man-made garden with a waterfall isn't appealing. And the fewer people around the better, so unless I am unemployed again in the spring perhaps winter is a good time to visit. Whatever - it's Portlandish and it's free from Labor Day through February. So it's all good.
  

Why is making these lists more fun than actually gearing up to do something on the list? Sigh.

Ah yes, the old "guilt by proximity" approach.

The latest pathetic attempt at an accusation implies that I am BFFs with the couple who were featured in my neighborhood association's summer newsletter. You know, the ones who garden in their underwear, brag about breaking into their own home, ignore the fact that there are actually non-white people living in this neighborhood, and have a pet crow. I resent this implication. You betcha I do.

I get that in today's fearful and fend-for-yourself world, many people probably don't understand that an experienced community organizer gets to know who is in their neighborhood (regardless of whether they are still actively organizing or not) and might actually have a conversation with them if they see them on the street.

That (potentially understandable) misunderstanding aside, the rest is just a lie, and I really hope the American people are smarter than Palin and McCain think.

And this?

Why, it's awesome. Definitely turn up your volume. I laughed and laughed.

That's what he said.

Best summary of the VEEP debate I've seen yet. (I also thought he was doing Sudoku.)

Seriously, there is no Office episode tonight? How in the world am I going to recover from this and also prep for tomorrow? Damn you, Hollywood.