Sunday, August 03, 2008

Idea #32: break it off.

Idea #32 in the magic book is about relationship deal-breakers. So, in the interest of achieving a September goal, here are mine. Probably no surprises.
  1. Jealousy. I dated a guy for waaaaaaay too long who was very jealous of my guy friends. My guy friends who I'd known forever who I had no romantic inclinations toward. He threw me a surprise 21st birthday party, invited my guy friends, then got into a big fight with me during the party because I had so many guy friends. Well duh, you invited them, you moron. I'm actually embarrassed to think about how long I dated him. And I'm certainly not going to admit it.
  2. Cheating. I had this happen to me once and it's an awful feeling. I also did this once and later hated myself for it. (I was young and stupid... people have done worse things when they were young and stupid.) It ended the relationship, which in the end was probably not a terrible thing, but it's still fairly unforgivable and I'll never do it again, nor will I tolerate it again.
  3. Cat intolerance. One guy I dated briefly couldn't stand the fact that my cats slept on the bed at night. Um, yeah. Buh-bye.
  4. Hardcore addiction of any sort (drugs, gambling... skiing... you know). I've never been in this situation but I've seen enough Interventions to know that this would not be good for me.
  5. Guys in bands. Been there, done that, no thanks. I love music but I will never again date a musician.
This assumes we actually make it to the dating phase though. I've got mad Chandler Bing tendencies that stop relationships dead in their tracks before they even start. Any little quirk like nail-biting, insisting Rambo is the best movie ever, quoting Tolkien too much, bringing me flowers or repeatedly doing terrible impersonations of celebrities might be an immediate deal-breaker.

Friendship deal-breakers are a whole other story. For another time. Until then, what are your relationship deal-breakers, single peeps?
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4 comments:

  1. Melinda9:28 AM, August 04, 2008

    If he has the no-shoes-in-the-house rule. Intolerable. Otherwise, I'm pretty openminded.

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  2. Jen(n)6:56 AM, August 07, 2008

    Unless it's a cultural thing, right?

    I wouldn't be able to tolerate someone who MADE me wear shoes in the house... I hate shoes. :)

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  3. Dr. Beads11:50 PM, August 07, 2008

    Hell, Jen(n), my spouse is jealous of my male friends. And probably of my female friends.

    Tip: don't date a guy whose family members are his best friends. They'll end up being his only friends.

    What's wrong with being brought flowers?

    Lurv,
    Dr. Beads
    P.S. That was an exaggeration about his family members being his best friends. When we met, 2 of his 3 roommates were his best friends. Guess what? He can't stand the thought of them now, for (mostly) trivial reasons.

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  4. Jen(n)7:52 PM, August 08, 2008

    I like flowers, but it's so cheesy on a first date. Or a ninth date. Or any kind of date. Plus, my cat will eat them and then puke all night. Not good. Flowers belong in the ground.

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